Gotta Have Goals

poster-what-doesnt-kill-you-med-295x400

Also: depressed, self-destructive, afraid, uncertain, lost, and weak. But eventually, it seems, stronger.

Something very bad happened to my family about 7 years ago. It isn’t really something I talk about, but it broke me for a very long time. For a long, long while I thought it broke me permanently. It has only been the past year or so that I think I’m coming back to myself; that I might actually make it through after all.

When the bad thing happened, I was completely adrift. One of the things, I realize in hindsight, was that I lost all my goals. Everything I thought I was working towards, everything I thought I was building, had been kicked away as if it was a sand-castle. I had no goals for the longest time. I was just moving through life, dealing with things as they popped up (or not dealing with them, more often than not).

Goals are an essential part of our self-esteem. As an educator, I talk to teachers all the time about having students set goals. If you want to achieve something, you need to set a goal that is measurable, achievable, and of personal value to you. It also helps to have both long-term and short-term goals. This is true for our personal lives as well.

Goals give us directions. They give us a path or journey to get there.

Over the past year I have worked very hard to help set goals for myself, which in turn have improved my quality of life and feelings of self-worth. I’ve achieved some of my short-term goals. For example, I needed to get a new job and get out of my previous business. I was very successful and found a job I love and pays well.

Some of my goals are works in progress. I also have goals I’ve left by the wayside. I either have to dust them off and recommit, or let them go. I’m re-evaluating my goals now, and deciding which ones have a place in my life.

Self-Talk-Achieiving-GoalsSome of my goals are health related. If you’ve been following my blog, you know I’m trying to walk 3,000,000 steps this year, which means an average of 8,000 steps per day. I’ve been successfully working towards this goal all year, and I’m even thinking what I’ll do once I achieve this goal, which seems very, very likely.

I feel like I’ve always had a weight-loss goal. My whole life it seems I’ve wanted to either lose weight or maintain weight loss. In June I hit a weight loss goal (under 200) that had long seemed unreachable. I debated for a long time whether I wanted to set a new weight goal or not. My fit-bit app keeps giving me a “Woo Hoo” for reaching my goal and I’ve wondered if it makes sense to reset that goal. I’ve lost 12 more pounds since then, even without having specific goal. I keep writing things like your weight doesn’t matter, focus on health, but I’m not sure I 100% believe that yet, since I still weigh myself every other week. I guess I still haven’t made up my mind yet, which is a decision in itself.

I think there may be a part of my life that I’m skimping on: I have life and career goals, I have health and fitness goals, but I don’t see to have any spiritual goals. I haven’t figured out what I need or what I’m looking for, so (and I know this may sound crazy) I think I need to set a goal to develop one or more spiritual goals. I’m still figuring out how to word this goal so it is specific, timely, measurable, and  all the things a good goal needs to be, but there you have it.

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8 thoughts on “Gotta Have Goals

  1. What a beautiful reflection. My (specific and measurable) weight loss goal is the first real goal I’ve had in a long, long time. It seems to have given me back my power. I feel strong and happy when I make daily, deliberate choices to stay the path. Namaste.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I love that you’re coming back to yourself. I wrote about that sort of thing today too. Or was it last night? Anyway, to find yourself, re-evaluate what’s important and what makes you move in the right direction feels so good. Keep moving!!
    I had a fitbit, but mine got recalled. I’m seriously excited to hear the news about Apple’s iWatch today.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Which fitbit got recalled? I have the cheapest one (zip) for a year and a half with no issues or problems. I don’t think I would wear an iWatch (I wear no jewelry) but I’d be curious to see how you like it, when it get’s released.

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      • It was the Fitbit Force. It was causing some folk’s skin to break out. It was a shame too, I really liked that one. However I’m a gadget goose. I want to see what Apple’s does before I go back to Fitbit. I don’t shop much, but I do love technology. Expensive habit, though. Sigh.

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  3. I think weight loss goals are hard to handle sometimes, because numbers on a scale mean very little, especially when you are building muscle and are as fit as you have become. I do think goals work though, for you espcially so choosing the right goals are very important. One of my issues with weight goals is once you reached it, then what? Maintaining that weight doesn’t feel like a goal because you can’t check it off your list or get a whoohoo from your fit bit for staying the same. So developing new ways to excel on your path is a more sustainable goal structure IMO.

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    • Exactly. And weight loss isn’t a goal anyway. It may be how you measure a specific goal, but the goal is always something else. Figuring out what goals you want is both tricky and imperative.

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  4. Pingback: Set Good Goals | Fat 'n Forty

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